kingsizeThere’s a river a couple of miles from my house. Last summer I went there in the middle of April. In July this place is usually swarming with people swimming, sun-bathing and having fun. But the water was still way too cold and so I was alone. I dove into the ice cold river and when I got back out I was shivering. I found a place in the sun, grabbed my android and fell asleep with an amazing tune in my ears. That tune was “Gold” by Kingsize. When I listen to it I can still feel the sand between my fingers. I wrote a quick mail to Jason Gordon (Kingsize) wondering what the track was all about and Jason replied:

“Gold” is one of those rare songs where the lyrics and melody all came out at the same time. I was rushing to keep up with my pen as it was coming out. After it was done, I read the lyrics and – once again – couldn’t believe how the magic of songwriting works. “Gold” was the story of a sea captain who took his search for whatever it was too far. This song was all that remained from his journey, all he had left. And he was now just saying he was sorry to the wives and children of the crew that were lost under his command.

Where the fuck did that come from? I have no idea. But, here it was.

It was so different from anything we had ever done that we didn’t release for a couple years, not knowing where it fit in our catalog. We finally settled on just having it be a lonely single. But, right before we did that, I had a conversation with a woman I had never met. She knew nothing about our band and we had never met. She was a mystic who spoke to people about their lives, about their pain.

She told me that I was sad. Always had been. And it was true. There was always something there. Some sort of crime I always felt guilty of. My mom had even told me that as a small child I would I hit my head against the wall and scream that I hated myself. This woman – this mystic – told me I had been holding some pain from a past life.

I was a captain of a ship. And many men died under my command. But, I lived to tell the tale.

Fuck me.


When you earn a living selling music, it’s easy to forget where it all came from. We put price tags on each song, we sell it, we place it, we license it. We treat it like an item in a store and people can go in and buy it. Sometimes it’s just a product. But sometimes music is so much more than that.